Cameron advises us to ‘control our children’…..what an arse!!

Cameron advises us to ‘control our children’…..what an arse!! 150 150 Jane Evans

A word form the not so wise!!

The man who left his child in a pub and drove away is dispensing advice on how WE should raise our children so we had better pay attention?! Unfortunately, he is also the man at the head of our country’s elected government so if he says we all need parenting classes then presumably we must?!

I do agree that parenting is not something any of us just ‘know’ how to do; we don’t, and only have childhood experiences to replicate, or avoid, which can be very tricky! My fear is that what Cameron will welcome and seek is parenting classes which focus on ‘controlling children’s behaviour’ and that would categorically be wrong.

Here are the reasons why:

  • It should be a basic human right NOT to be coerced and controlled by another (see recent law on coercive control!!)
  • Control implies the use of rewards, consequences and bloody boundaries – these are scientifically ‘old hat’ and only get temporary compliance, if you are lucky and long term sneakiness & avoidance
  • Parents, and most importantly children, deserve parenting information that is ‘state of the art’ using actual, up to date research, shock horror!!!

Let’s not go back to the dark ages

Parenting programmes do focus more now on the relationship building with a child BUT most still rely on BLOODY CONSEQUENCES if the child ‘steps out of line’ – see reference to ‘old hat’ above.

I would love for anyone present in the life of any child, in any way, to freely and as a matter of course to have daily access to information about how to support optimal brain and body development. To fully understand that great behaviour comes from a great start and adults, who model, extend and offer unremitting kindness, emotional connection and compassionate teaching about how to behave and be in relationships.

I greatly fear that if old Cameron is going to focus on ‘controlling children’ then they are all doomed and so, my friends are we!!

Jane Evans

Jane is a ‘learn the hard way’ person. She has learnt from her personal experiences and her direct work with people who have often been in really bad places emotionally, relationally, practically and sometimes professionally.

All stories by: Jane Evans

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