My Blogs

A ‘safety focused’ version of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Need On a dull August afternoon it seems like a good time to update a longstanding model of the hierarchy of human needs. (as you do!!) Not to be disruptive, honest. But because my work, studies and life have taught me the immense value and necessity of…

I love dogs But…I’ve always wondered why it is easier for many to feel compassion for a traumatised dog than for children and adults with early experiences of trauma. Is it because humans often show their trauma in ways society finds challenging, and judges harshly? My friend and colleague Fiona Scott has recently welcomed Jessie,…

To be surrounded by broken pieces of your child’s new furniture surely feels bewildering. Or, like a heartrending rejection of the love, kindness, time and energy you have gladly offered them. The furniture, so lovingly chosen, was meant to help them settle in and have a sense of their own things and of belonging. Purchased,…

Self Harm UK says it so well, “Let’s get one thing straight right here: self-harm doesn’t feel nice, it just sometimes feels better than the emotional pain it’s trying to hide. In reality, it doesn’t even do that; not really. Self-harm isn’t nice, the person you care about isn’t hurting themselves because it feels good,…

It’s important for every child to be able to feel all of their emotional states. Boredom is one of those. When they struggle to tolerate feeling bored, it can become a real problem. Boredom is a very normal physical and emotional experience so it’s important we resist the temptation to help children to avoid it!…

When should we start? Children are going to go on social media. That’s why we need to be educated in all the latest apps that spring up like weeds. Most of your children’s friends will be on something, and will share their phones etc. My son is grown up now. If he was young nowadays.…

  Alarming new statistics on Children’s mental health should scare us all!  Firstly, because so many young children in our affluent 21st century ARE suffering. Secondly, because it’s entirely preventable. Thirdly, because solutions are SIMPLE. Even I was shocked by the statistics in this recent BBC article, “In 2017-18, some 18,870 children aged under 11 were…

There has been a big backlash from an interview with expert, Deanne Carson who, “…suggested parents ask their infants questions such as: ‘I’m going to change your nappy now, is that okay?” But if you leave a space and wait for body language and wait to make eye contact then you are letting that child know…

How many hours sleep do we need to live a healthy and productive life? Depends on who you ask. Some people swear they do fine on 5 hours and believe sleep is for lazy wimps. Others will say they love to sleep but are rubbish at it. Then there are those who believe they can…